Reading people
Idioms, Stage 4chunk 17 of 22Getting on with people
Sensing what others feel or want without being told.
- aite no mi ni naruput yourself in the other person's placeliterally “become the other person's self”
- kuuki o yomuread the mood, pick up on the vibeliterally “read the air”
- kaoiro o ukagauwatch someone's mood, anxiously try to stay on their good sideliterally “peer at someone's complexion”
- ishin denshinunderstanding each other without wordsliterally “by heart, transmit heart”
Mix-ups kuuki o yomu (read the room) vs kaoiro o ukagau (anxiously watch one person's mood); aite no mi ni naru is empathy, ishin denshin is understanding each other without words.
aite no mi ni naru
polite aite no mi ni narimasu
“become the other person's self”
put yourself in the other person's place
In English: put yourself in someone's shoes
Two shapes: advice, aite no mi ni natte kangaete (think how they'd feel), and, heard even more, the complaint about yourself: chotto wa watashi no mi ni mo natte yo (try being in my shoes for once). Anyone can fill the slot: kodomo no mi ni natte. It's imagining one person's side; kuuki o yomu is sensing the room.
Rough complaint: ore no mi ni mo natte miro! (try being in my shoes!). Also aite no tachiba ni natte (from their position).
aite no mi ni natte kangaete mina yo.
Try seeing it from their side.
相手の身になって考えてみなよ。
aite no mi ni natte kangaete mite kudasai.
Please try to see it from their side.
相手の身になって考えてみてください。
Written 相手の身になる · あいてのみになるHeard 51× in 3.17 million lines of film and TV subtitlesLearn alongside kuuki o yomu, kaoiro o ukagau, ishin denshinMain list naru (Stage 1), kangaeru (Stage 2), -te miru (Stage 1)
kuuki o yomu
polite kuuki o yomimasu
“read the air”
read the mood, pick up on the vibe
In English: read the room
Mostly a complaint about someone who doesn't: kuuki yomenai (he can't read the room), kuuki yome yo (read the room!). It's sensing the mood; ki o tsukau is actively being considerate.
ano hito, honto kuuki yomenai yo ne.
He really can't read the room, can he?
あの人、ほんと空気読めないよね。
ano hito, hontou ni kuuki yomenai desu yo ne.
He really can't read the room, can he?
あの人、本当に空気読めないですよね。
Written 空気を読む · くうきをよむHeard 19× in 3.17 million lines of film and TV subtitlesLearn alongside aite no mi ni naru, kaoiro o ukagau, ishin denshinMain list -eru / -rareru (Stage 2), -nai (Stage 1)
kaoiro o ukagau
polite kaoiro o ukagaimasu
“peer at someone's complexion”
watch someone's mood, anxiously try to stay on their good side
In English: walk on eggshells
Mostly a complaint about someone always checking how a boss, parent or partner will react: joushi no kaoiro bakkari ukagatteru. Close to kuuki o yomu, but fixed on one person's mood and the fear of upsetting them.
Literal kaoiro ga warui = look pale.
ano hito, itsumo joushi no kaoiro bakkari ukagatteru.
All he ever does is watch the boss's mood.
あの人、いつも上司の顔色ばっかりうかがってる。
ano hito, itsumo joushi no kaoiro bakari ukagattemasu yo ne.
He's always watching the boss's mood, isn't he?
あの人、いつも上司の顔色ばかりうかがってますよね。
Written 顔色をうかがう · かおいろをうかがうHeard 7× in 3.17 million lines of film and TV subtitlesLearn alongside aite no mi ni naru, kuuki o yomu, ishin denshinMain list itsumo (Stage 2), bakkari (Stage 2), -teru (Stage 1)
ishin denshin
“by heart, transmit heart”
understanding each other without words
A playful comment when a friend or partner reads your mind: ishin denshin da ne. Said about couples, close friends or a well-tuned team.
sore iou to omotteta! ishin denshin da ne.
I was just about to say that! You read my mind.
それ言おうと思ってた！以心伝心だね。
sore, ima iou to omotte imashita. ishin denshin desu ne.
I was just about to say that. You read my mind.
それ、今言おうと思っていました。以心伝心ですね。
Written 以心伝心 · いしんでんしんHeard 3× in 3.17 million lines of film and TV subtitlesLearn alongside aite no mi ni naru, kuuki o yomu, kaoiro o ukagauMain list -ou / -you to omou (Stage 4)