Manners and thanks
Collocations, Stage 3chunk 18 of 23People & talk
Being polite and grateful: saying thanks, speaking politely, not making a fuss, and the guest's thanks for care and meals.
- orei o iuthank someone, say thanks
- keigo o tsukauspeak politely, use honorifics
- ki o tsukaube considerate, go to trouble
- osewa ni narube looked after, be indebted
- gochisou ni narube treated (to a meal)
Mix-ups keigo o tsukau (speak politely) and ki o tsukau (fuss over others) share tsukau, and ki o tsukau is not ki o tsukeru (be careful). In osewa ni naru and gochisou ni naru, ni naru puts you on the receiving end; the giver says mendou o miru or ogoru.
orei o iu
polite orei o iimasuthank someone, say thanks
お礼を言う おれいをいう お礼を言います
verbiu 言うsaytypical 66% of orei
trap English 'thank' leads to kansha suru, which is being grateful (kansha shiteru = I'm grateful), not saying it: 'I have to thank them' is orei iwanakya. orei o suru means giving something back, like a gift or a meal.
For talking about thanking rather than doing it (arigatou does that): orei iwanakya (I have to thank them), chanto orei itta? (did you thank them properly?), orei iitakute (I wanted to say thanks).
ato de chanto orei iwanakya.
I need to thank them properly later.
後でちゃんとお礼言わなきゃ。
ato de chanto orei o iwanakya ikemasen ne.
I really should thank them properly later.
後でちゃんとお礼を言わなきゃいけませんね。
orei ni = as thanks: orei ni gohan ogoru yo (dinner's on me, as thanks).
Same verb: oseji (compliments, flattery), oiwai (congratulations: oiwai iitakute = I wanted to congratulate them)Learn alongside: monku o iu, guchi o iu, honne o iu (Stage 4)Main list: iu (Stage 2), arigatou (Stage 1), -nakya (Stage 3), chanto (Stage 3)
keigo o tsukau
polite keigo o tsukaimasuspeak politely, use honorifics
敬語を使う けいごをつかう 敬語を使います
verbtsukau 使うuse
trap English 'speak keigo' leads to keigo o hanasu, on the model of nihongo o hanasu. It is heard (keigo ga hanasenai), but the everyday verb is tsukau (keigo tsukau), or keigo de hanasu.
Mostly heard as the offer to drop it: keigo tsukawanakute ii yo (no need to be formal with me), often followed by tameguchi de ii yo (talk to me casually). Also for describing relationships: senpai ni wa keigo tsukau (I speak politely to my seniors).
keigo tsukawanakute ii yo.
No need to be formal with me.
敬語使わなくていいよ。
keigo wa tsukawanakute ii desu yo.
You don't need to speak formally with me.
敬語は使わなくていいですよ。
Sounds like ki tsukawanakute ii yo (don't go to any trouble), the other host line; drill them together.
Same verb: hougen (dialect), kotoba (words: warui kotoba o tsukau = use bad language), eigo (English: eigo o tsukau shigoto = a job using English)Main list: tsukau (Stage 3), hanasu (Stage 2), -nakute mo ii (Stage 3)
ki o tsukau
polite ki o tsukaimasube considerate, go to trouble
気を遣う きをつかう 気を遣います
verbtsukau 遣うuse, spend; here, spend your attention on otherstypical 1% of ki
trap Not ki o tsukeru (be careful): 'don't go to any trouble' is ki o tsukawanaide, and the mix-up gives ki o tsukenaide, 'don't be careful'.
Hosts and guests say ki o tsukawanakute ii yo or ki o tsukawanaide (don't go to any trouble). About a person, ano hito to iru to ki tsukau means you have to tiptoe around them.
sonna ki tsukawanakute ii yo.
You don't have to fuss over me like that.
そんな気遣わなくていいよ。
sonna ni ki o tsukawanakute ii desu yo.
Please don't go to any trouble.
そんなに気を遣わなくていいですよ。
Also written 気を使う; the noun is kizukai (thoughtfulness).
Same verb: shinkei (nerves: shinkei tsukau = it takes a lot of care, it's nerve-racking)Learn alongside: ki ga tsuku, ki ni iruMain list: ki o tsukeru (Stage 2), ki o tsukete (Stage 1), tsukau (Stage 3), ki ni suru (Stage 2), -nakute mo ii (Stage 3)
osewa ni naru
polite osewa ni narimasube looked after, be indebted
お世話になる おせわになる お世話になります
verbnaru なるbecome; here, come to be in someone's caretypical 67% of osewa
trap English 'thanks for looking after me' leads to sewa shite kurete arigatou, which fits literal care (nursing you when sick, minding your pet). Friends say iroiro arigatou; to hosts, teachers and colleagues the set thanks is osewa ni narimashita.
Mostly polite and set: kyou kara osewa ni narimasu when you start a stay or a job, osewa ni narimashita (thank you for everything) when you leave a host, job or school. In business you'll hear the humble osewa ni natte orimasu (recognise it, no need to say it). Casual osewa ni natta is used when describing someone who helped you.
ano senpai ni wa honto ni osewa ni natta.
That senior really looked out for me.
あの先輩にはほんとにお世話になった。
ano senpai ni wa hontou ni osewa ni narimashita.
That senior really looked after me.
あの先輩には本当にお世話になりました。
gochisou ni naru (be treated to a meal) is built the same way: with ni naru, you are the one receiving. The one doing the looking after says mendou o miru (or sewa o suru).
Same verb: gochisou (a treat: be treated to a meal), yakkai (being a burden: rely on someone)Learn alongside: mendou o miru, gohan o ogoru, gochisou ni naruMain list: naru (Stage 1), arigatou (Stage 1), yoroshiku (Stage 1), -te kurete arigatou (Stage 2)
gochisou ni naru
polite gochisou ni narimasube treated (to a meal)
ごちそうになる ごちそうになります
verbnaru なるbecome; here, come to be the one treated
trap English 'I got treated' leads to the passive gochisou sareta, which is heard but less usual; people say gochisou ni natta (like osewa ni naru), ogotte moratta or ogorareta. The payer's verbs are ogoru and gochisou suru.
Said by the one being treated. When someone offers to pay (kyou wa ogoru yo), you accept with jaa, gochisou ni narimasu, and afterwards you thank them with gochisou ni narimashita, to a boss, senpai or host. Among friends gochisousama! does both jobs, and telling someone about it is gochisou ni natta or, more often, ogotte moratta (they paid for me).
kinou senpai ni gochisou ni natta.
My senpai treated me to a meal yesterday.
昨日先輩にごちそうになった。
kinou wa gochisou ni narimashita.
Thank you for dinner yesterday.
昨日はごちそうになりました。
gochisou on its own is a feast or treat: sugoi gochisou (what a spread).
Same verb: osewa (care: be looked after), yakkai (imposing: tomodachi no ie ni yakkai ni naru = stay at a friend's place)Learn alongside: mendou o miru, gohan o ogoru, osewa ni naruMain list: naru (Stage 1), gochisousama (Stage 1), -te morau (Stage 2)